Last year in September, hubbs and I took a little trip to Galena, IL. We called it our mini-honeymoon because we didn’t go away right after we got married.
The weekend after our one year anniversary, we went to Galena again. It felt different, and not just because we had been married for a year as opposed to a couple months. It felt different because we actually got to REST instead of just go on a vacation.
We’ve been learning alot about rest this year as a couple. We had so many responsibilities when we got married and we just kept adding more in the months that followed. Eventually we both hit our breaking points. Individually we were stressed to the max, and as a couple we were strained. We were fighting more. We were nagging more. The very little time we had together was tense and usually full of arguments and tears.
I think that every marriage goes through stages like these, probably. But we definitely got sick of it and decided to do something. We made time to talk, we identified our issues, and we got to work on them. (No, it was not as easy at it sounds.)
One of the main things we had to do was go through our list of responsibilities and determine what would stay and what would go. We knew we couldn’t keep trying to do it all, so we started saying no to things. We planned date nights on the calendar, as well as “friend time” for each of us individually. We set aside time after work each night to have dinner together, and we started being very careful to protect our time together.
We also planned some trips and get-aways for ourselves. They don’t all cost a lot of money, and they aren’t all overnight trips. But they are vacations from life – time to just be together.
So, this year when we went to Galena, we had a different mindset. We put away our phones, told people to leave us alone (ha), and got people to cover us at church so we didn’t have to worry about our positions there. We went into the weekend with the attitude of enjoying each other, and we focused on recharging – together. And we ended up enjoying the weekend even more than last year. We were refocused, recharged and reunited.
It’s so important to get away with your spouse – even if you just get away to your bedroom and lock the door for a few hours. Be proactive, make a plan, and be protective of your time together.
How do you make time to rest together?
Read more about living a more restful life here.