We welcomed a new little one into our family this past summer and have been enjoying the beautifully exhausting transition to a family of four. I had forgotten how tiny and wonderful a brand new baby is! I sat down to write out the details of her arrival before tired mommy brain set in (I was so glad I did this with Logan! Read his birth story here.). My mom was able to be in the room with us this time, which was really special. Most of the photos of labor/delivery were taken by her, as it was especially important to me to enjoy and remember the experience. My labor with Logan was very difficult mentally and emotionally and I barely remember any of it. I kept praying throughout pregnancy, that God would fill me with peace and joy and strength and I really feel like this little lady was a sort of redemption story – a gift from God in more ways than one. So, without further ado – read on for Miss Loralei Rayne’s birth story (and some sweet details about her name!).
The weekend before Loralei was born was full of new house activities. We went to the furniture store on Saturday, where I hoisted my preggo self in and out of several chairs and couches before declaring that we needed to go (because it honestly felt like I was going to either pee my pants or have a baby with every step I took). Sunday, June 30th, we stayed home from church but needed to go finish cleaning out our old apartment. Upon arrival, we found that the electricity had been turned off, and – because it was ridiculously hot and humid – working inside was miserable. Nevertheless, we got to work and I kept thinking how proud I was of myself that I could still get around (because with Logan, my experience was quite the opposite). A couple hours in to loading up and cleaning, a massive storm blew in out of nowhere and we decided to hightail it back to the house (which was a good thing – it was a bad storm!).
We were sitting on the couch, eating a late dinner, feeling a bit guilty that Logan was still up at 9pm when I felt what I was pretty certain was a contraction. Around 9:30 I was certain enough that I quietly started tracking them. Over the next hour or so, I became more and more certain that our little girl was going to be arriving much earlier than July 17th.
Around 10:30pm, I went running to the bathroom with an upset stomach and peed more than I had in several months. Josh came to check on me and I looked at him and said, “I think my water broke but I’m not positive.” With Logan, I knew right away. This time was much different.
Over the next few hours, I tracked my contractions as we watched Fixer Upper. (because…Chip and Jo 😉 ) They got more intense but not more regular, so I tried walking, rocking, yoga. I was so tired and knew I’d be up for a good long while if this baby was indeed coming, so I tried to lay down and get some sleep. I couldn’t really sleep and my contractions were more painful laying down, so I got up around 2am and walked around and around the kitchen island listening to relaxing worship music and timing my contractions. Every few laps, I’d stop at the stairs and breathe through the contraction and then back to walking and praying.
I had dealt with so much fear in my pregnancy and labor with Logan, that I think I almost feared the fear this time around. But instead of giving in, I decided to say “Not today, Satan!” and had mantras and verses and prayers at the ready.
That time walking in circles in the middle of the night was honestly so peaceful and so precious to me. I was able to pray through my fears and truly felt God’s presence the entire time. I was able to focus on excitement, not anxiety and really just pray over the little life about to come into the world.
At 3:30, I noticed that the contractions seemed to be coming much more regularly and about an hour later they were every 4 or 5 minutes. I called the doctor and when they got back to me around 5, I went in and woke Josh up. (I’d sent him to bed after he frantically ordered all the baby things we didn’t have yet, – praise Jesus for Amazon prime!, packed the car, and I’m pretty sure cleaned the entire house.) He called my mama-in-law to come get Logan, and I called my mama so that she could come to hospital. I remember thinking how crazy it was to be so calm, and I packed the last of my things into my bag.
Logan woke up in the commotion of us getting ready to leave, and we were able to have a few moments with him explaining that Loralei was on her way. He was so excited!!
We headed to the hospital and my contractions intensified in the very short drive there, so much so that the intake nurse at the ER called ahead and got us to our room in record time.
I was able to talk in between contractions, but had to hold Josh’s hand and take 6 deep breaths to get through each one (so specific, I know!). Our doctors were able to meet us in triage and after they checked me, determined that my water had indeed broken, I was 5cm and not going anywhere. There was some concern because little lady had somehow flipped face up, so once we got settled into our room, we started doing everything we could to flip her.
We were able to see the sun rise, listen to music, and just talk as the day started. We walked, bounced, crouched, got in the tub – anything to stay out of the bed. I was so tired already, but I knew once I got in bed I wouldn’t get back out. It was such a good experience – fun, even. I was relaxed, excited and trusting God, Josh, the process, the nurses and doctors. Painful and trying, yes. But it was so drastically different than my other experience that I just couldn’t help but smile.
I really enjoyed the tub because I could float and it took some pressure off, but I could tell that my contractions had stalled a bit. Once I got out, we walked the halls and they seemed to pick up with a vengeance. After that, I got into bed to try to rest, but things started progressing more. The doctors were in and out, and at one point there was some concern about baby and I because I started to lose my calm and hyperventilate. Once I got back into my breathing rhythm, everything leveled out and was okay.
When they checked me later on, I was at 9cm but wasn’t progressing any further. At this point, I could still talk between contractions but they were very intense and painful and I had a few moments of panic and overwhelm. Josh and mom (who arrived around the time I got into bed) and our sweet nurse were so good at empathizing but also reminding me that I could do this. My mantra was “I can do hard things.” and I just kept repeating it over and over.
I felt like I needed to push, but could tell it wasn’t quite time yet and because it had been so long, the doctor came and checked me again and they decided that my water had not fully broken. The baby was extremely low and had moved enough that they could feel a pocket of fluid in front of her head. They decided to break it and holy moley did that get things moving!
I still laugh at this part, because my doctor stood up from breaking my water and was explaining that we’d wait until the next several contractions to see if it made a difference and if I felt I needed to push. What felt like immediately after he said that, I had a contraction and looked at him and said “not going to need to wait!”
Things get a little more blurry after that because of how quickly she made her entrance. They got everything ready, I mentally tried to prepare but panicked a little, and then I was pushing. It only took a few pushes, but because of how quickly she came I couldn’t tell when I was contracting, so it was hard to get my bearings and know when to push. I started to freak out and yell that I couldn’t do it, and my doctor said so calmly, “Open your eyes. Look at me. We are all here to help you do this.” And I remember my mom encouraging me from the side, the nurse encouraging me and my sweet husband whisper (because he knows curse words make me giggle) “You can do hard shit.” I laughed, took a deep breath and pushed. At which point Josh again whispered “Gird up your loins” (which is a whole other story in itself, thanks to my Dad). I laughed internally that time because every ounce of strength I had was going to get this baby out. Somewhere in there I kicked the doctor in the arm pretty hard, changed from yelling “I can’t” to whispering strongly “I CAN do this” and then all of a sudden she was here.
Whoosh out from my belly and into my arms was this beautiful – very blue – bundle of love. The first thing everyone said as she crowned was “look at all that hair” and then “look at those cheeks!” (Our doctor said the cheeks were why she didn’t come out sooner.)
She didn’t cry much at first, but the nurses caught my worried looks and said “she’s fine, honey” and we laughed and smiled and ooed and awed over every inch of her.
The afterbirth experience was not so pleasant, but again – my whole team of people was right there with me for it. I honestly can not say enough good things about every person that was in that room with me.
Loralei Rayne was born at 1:53 on July 1st, 2019 weighing 8 pounds and 1 oz. She was 19.5 in long, just like her big brother.
I had taken photos of our family and of me and my daddy in with me and as I looked at them throughout labor and as I was holding my sweet girl, I just couldn’t help but be full of so many emotions at once. I miss my daddy so much, but he was with me in my head and heart every step of the way. (My necklace is his fingerprint, so that I had something tangible to remind me of him.)
We chose Loralei’s name for a few special reasons. Loralei is the name of a character from Gilmore Girls – my mom and I’s show. So, tongue in cheek, she’s named after my mom. Loralei is also Celtic and means laurel or sweet bay tree; a symbol of victory. It’s so fitting for her – she is a sweet symbol of my victory over fear during this pregnancy and during her birth. She’s the start of a new season for our family. Her middle name, Rayne, is in honor of my grandmother Lorayne – who we lovingly called Gramma ‘Rayne. Rayne means strong counselor, queen, mighty, song.
She’s our little symbol of victory – our freedom song – over one of the most difficult times in our lives. Both times my babies have been placed in my arms I am in awe that God gifts us little humans to fill up holes in our soul that we didn’t even know existed. We’ve prayed strength of character and grace over Lor and can’t wait to see what mighty things our Mighty God does in and through her. She’s our little queen for sure!