Choosing a word of the year seems like such a daunting task. As a Christ follower, I want the word to be something that God is working on in my heart. But what if I couldn’t think of a word? What if He didn’t give me a word for the year? Or what if the word I chose wasn’t the “right” one?
I had many words in my head for 2018 – freedom, rest, restoration, just to name a few. I kept thinking back on 2017 – the “Life-Giving” year. So much happened last year – Logan turned 1, I dove into a business, we took our first family vacation, my husband’s job took him away a lot, and my father died. Yet, through it all I really did see God’s hand at work. Even when I was angry and sad, when I took time for stillness I could see glimpses of the bigger picture. I started out the year thinking that I was supposed to be creating this life-giving environment for everyone else and choosing to give life in all areas, and that was a lesson that I began to learn. But I think the experiences I lived through in the past year have given me a perspective on what real, true, abundant life looks like. My heavenly father showed me that even when – especially when – everything is falling apart, He gives life and gives me what I need to offer life to others.
For 2018, my word is “ENTRUSTED.” I really do feel like God placed this word in my heart and as I began to think more about it, I saw details of my life that pointed to it as well.
At first, I wrestled with this word because it seems like an odd choice. I feel like “rest” or “restore” would have been more appropriate. But I just could not get this word out of my head! I wrote a blog post a few months ago called When Your Husband Gets a Break and You Don’t and shared that I had been convicted of living entitled rather than entrusted. Ever since that post, this word would pop into my head in times of tension or stress. It’s really begun to help me gain a completely different perspective.
As I worked on my goals for the year, my Powersheets prep helped me decide to focus on my faith, family, finances and friends. And living entrusted rather than entitled in each of those areas made so much sense to me.
Before we dive into my ideas on what living an entrusted life looks like in those four areas though, let’s define this word a little better.
verb1. assign the responsibility for doing something to (someone)– (i.e.) “I’ve been entrusted with the task of getting him safely back”2. put (something) into someone’s care or protection.– (i.e.) “you persuade people to entrust their savings to you”
Synonyms: charge, invest, endow, hand over, give custody of, turn over, commit, consign, deliver
Salvation is the greatest gift of all, and I want to get to know my Savior better. One of the goals born out of this entrusted journey is to read the Chronological Bible this year. I’m also committed to learning more about prayer and Heaven. Grace is a gift, not just a guarantee.
My husband and my son are so important to me, but I have been living as though I was entitled to something. Like I deserved a perfect life or for the diapers to magically be changed or to get 10 hours of sleep each night. Ever since we found out we were pregnant with Logan I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety and I had a difficult time enjoying my role as wife and mom. Since God brought this word into my heart, I feel like He is also bringing light into the dark places. Logan is my JOY not my job and Josh is my BLESSING not my burden.
In some ways, this is the most tangible area where we can get sucked into the entitlement trap. I deserve … I just need… If I just had…. Financial freedom is an area I’ve long struggled with – I tend to be an extremist (just as in other areas of my life). I’m either throwing cash all over the place or standing in the grocery store weighing whether or not we really need bananas. I’m finding that when I look at my finances through the lens of “How can I steward this gift well?” that things become much more clear.
I love people, but I’m an introvert. If I don’t have advanced notice, I’m probably going to panic. And if we have plans, there is a chance I’ll try to get out of it. Not because I don’t love to visit and talk, but because I need time alone or with a select group (aka – my husband) to get filled up again. HOWEVER, this has become a major “entitlement trap” for me. I’ve found myself thinking I deserve to stay home/binge watch this show/cancel plans under the guise of “me time” when really I just didn’t want to be vulnerable or must up the energy to love well. This is a fine line that I’m learning to walk. When I look at my relationships as something I’ve been trusted with, not something else on my to-do list, I find myself responding much differently.
What areas of your life have fallen into the entitlement trap? How are you going to live entrusted?